i realized that i cant speak fluent mandarin, only today. but yu see, usually im not being forced to speak mandarin so i wont and now, tada, since tmr's chi oral, i decided to speak mandarin when we were walking out to the bus stop. and only then did i realize that speaking mandarin's such a difficult task. i'd end up speaking with a few english words here and thr and then kaying will start yelling at me for being such a failure. yes im a bloody failure i cant speak mandarin properly. but surprisingly, if yu give me a passage and ask me to read it, i can XD. i actually scored a 9/10 or sth for last yr's passage thingy. uh yea so back to speaking mandarin, i tried i tried but i cldnt. HA, and when i speaked eng, sarah said i sounded angmoh-ish and kaying agreed. excuse me, i speak singlish okay! and i've been in sg since i was 2 and a half so whr am i supposed to get that angmoh accent? they said my chi sounded angmoh-ish too, maybe cus i was struggling and cldnt actually pronounce the words properly. but okay i admit i sounded like some foreigner when i tried to speak fluent mandarin jus now. smtimes it's rly hard to replace eng words with mandarin ones, like fine and uh okay i cant rmbr, but if yu use mandarin to replace these words that kinda "urgh fine" feel'll be gone.

oh, i also realised ky has caved-in eyes too XD. her eyelids are like bloody thick and it makes her eye look rly deep in and thus making it look caved-in.

im not in a gd mood today. dont ask me why.

im having trouble memorizing all the bio stuff :/ smone pls come and save me

worst thing that can EVR happen in one day: to sit in front of vincent for 1 whole bloody day. i jus realised he's annoying, LOL. i mean, he's fine if yu sit beside him for a while, BUT FOR A WHOLE DAY? i almost died today. yes and the most annoying thing was, he realized i was wearing my adidas today and commented that i have a lot of shoes so he asked me how many pairs of shoe i had and i counted... 8. and he got so shocked while he laughed and crap. HAHA anw the funny part was, he started asking evryone arnd him
vincent: eh minyu yu got how many pairs of shoe? include slippers ah!
minyu: err, 5?
vincent: orh okay yu see ppl include slippers also 5 only leh! then davin yu got how many pairs?
davin: 1 HAHA why?
vincent orh nth, eh CC yu got how many pairs of shoe?
CC: huh shoe? orh 1
vincent: eh jason yu got how many pairs of shoe?
jason: wht shoe? count spoil one or wht? cannot wear one count? orh dont count ah, err 1
vincent: changhong, yu got how many pairs of shoe?
changhong: *blurred, ah? 1?
vincent: SEE szewan! only yu will have 8 pairs okay.
me: wht not happy ah? i like shoes cannot is it?
vincent: ... i only have 2 pairs lor, and i think 1 is enough
me: if yu think 1 is enough then why on earth do yu have 2 pairs? shldnt yu jus stop at 1? why did yu get yur second pair?
vincent: cus that one..... (i cut him off befor he cld finish)
me: SO WHY THE HELL DO YU HAVE TWO PAIRS?
vincent: *shuts up

LOL okay nvrm. change subj. 2 down, 6 to go. wish me luck

and yea, i think im wasting my life away. yu see, teenagers are supposed to be having FUN at this age but look at me, i keep evryday of my life occupied and so, i barely get out of hse on weekdays AND saturdays. i dont suppose that's how im supposed to spend my sec3 life, am i? I WNA HAVE FUN FOR A DAY! and i mean fun

omg i've nvr tried studying like this befor. i woke up at 12.40 and had my lunch and since then, i've been studying and studying until 6. i did chem and bio and a maths. omgdness but haha, i cheated. okay for evry few pages of my textbk that's studied, i'd read a chpt of my book XD kekekeke. i think reading helps relieve stress. i enjoy reading sososoSO much, kinda like addicted. okay so anw, i jus studied and studied until i was so sick of it, then i read my book for a while and as expected, my dad came in and asked me out to do a maths. and me, being a gd girl, went out and did a maths until arnd 5 and went for a shower becus IF I CONTINUED STUDYING AND NOT REST, I'D DIE. hahahaha went to tm for dinner at 6. came back and i studied AGN. omg omg omg this time it was phy. like sheesh, i dont think i wna study anymore tmr

the name in my book is no longer mine, but filled with yurs

tiring day! no cca, no nth but it's like one of the most tiring days i've evr had. sch ends at 2.15 but our bio teacher let us off at 2.30, then some funny teacher in and briefed us on the damn CIP and wasted so much of our time. i left sch at arnd 2.50 with hannah and yol and steph and by right im supposed to reach home at 3.30 oh god rush rush rush but luckily my mum told me she'd alrdy sent my bro for lessons so i didnt have to reach home that early. as long as im back befor 4.45 to fetch my bro then it's fine. so i went to eat with them and sat arnd until 3.30 and we left. seriously, i've nvr evr felt so tired befor... anw, i reached home at 4.30 and so, rush rush rush agn. i jus went out of hse after putting my bag down and washed my face to keep myself awake. the thot of it is making me tired alrdy. came back a little befor 5 and i studied, i studied. and all of a sudden i rmbred i didnt take lunch, cus i went out with them and ate a piece of chocolate only. time passed rly quickly and soon it was 6 so it's time for dinner. (i didnt have time to nap okay! wed supposedly was the best day for naps but urghs) hahahaha i decided that i shld cont studying but instead i fell aslp on my sister's bed until 8+ and now i think im gna go study agn. im gna be a nerrrrrd

went to 7 11 after sch. i agree with michelle. i think im suffering from depression. how else can i explain why on earth i wld cry all of a sudden? not only that. i stared into space today at 7 11 while others are laughing their heads off. i mean, im the one who usually laughs A LOT and if im feeling normal i'd join in the fun and add some spice. but well, i guess i've got my smile wiped off my face alrdy. i laughed for the sake of showing evryone that im like, rly fine and i THINK wht they've said is funny not becus it's funny. forget it i dontknw wht im saying. i've jus lost that kinda laughter i used to have. i miss the old me. i miss my smile, my laughter. and pls, im rly rly not pms-ing. i've nvr evr felt like that befor. i skipped dinner, stayed in my rm and finished the stupid hw. not a hint of fun in me. i've lost myself.

havent been blogging the past few days, well, nth to blog abt actually. i finished my hw today. see im a gd girl. haha anw, im reading angels & demons now, so i kinda stayed home today and read. but not like some ppl who stays under the duvet all day jus to finish the book in a day XD! haha yea sch's reopening tmr and well, im prepared to die for CA. i havent started studying! oh god oh god nvrm. i'll probably end up dng some last minute study. but hell, im gna be real busy whole of next week.

HANNAH wo men you bu shi hen shou, stop tripping me! and dont quarrel with me and dont do anything to me that shou ppl will do. herhh~ LOL i love gng to toilets. but other than that, uh, nth much to blog abt today XD

i wanted to blog ytd but my stupid laptop was stupidly stupid and cldnt publish the post then the whole thing got deleted. okay to summarize evrything, im free of detention but im sick.

look i dontknw wht's wrong with me. i jus dont feel like i want my life anymore. ppl always think my life's almost perfect. the greatest family, triple sci, i get almost evrything i wish for. but recently, well i dontknw why either, i've been feeling rly down. i dont rly see the purpose of living. it's like, go to sch, eat, shit and slp evryday. and when i walked out with hannah jus now, i jus burst out in tears (see i told yu guys i needed a counsellor). i've been gng arnd evrywhr and smtimes when i think abt my life, i jus feel fed up and i find smwhr nice and cry. plus, i jus got that damn green letter. gotta go back to sch on mon and tues from 8.30 till 5 so it jus made things worse. it made me feel rly useless, rly rly hopeless. i've no idea how im gna show that damn piece of paper to my mum. so today i jus cried and cried and cried while walking out and i didnt care abt anything anymore. i didnt care whether ppl were staring at me thinking wth im dng out thr crying, neither did i care abt how stupid i looked after i cried. i jus wanted to be home and feel a sense of belonging. i've nvr evr felt so fucking down in my whole entire life. i dontknw wht's the reason for all these, maybe it's jus my mood swing kicking in. or maybe stress? they always say yu might not knw it even if yu're facing stress. okay so, stress, maybe that's it. yea maybe it rly is. i always walk and walk and suddenly think of the long list of to-dos. and when i think of it i jus feel like i wasnt living anymore and wished time wld jus stop at that point in time so i wldnt need to do anything. it's kinda a bit like, i'll start thinking of evrything and suddenly it jus seems like i've got so many many things to do then i'll have a rly bad mood and feel rly stressed up and i'll squat at some ulu ulu corner and cry. oh or maybe worse, depression? uh whtevr it is, im jus feeling down.

i dont feel like dng anything alrdy so i've cancelled my piano lesson. thank god my mum allowed it when i told her i rly wasnt in the mood. now im locking myself up in my rm while blogging, planning to take a nap soon.

HANNAH: im fine, rly, so dont wry abt me. thank you yu for walking out with me and watching me cry even though yu cld have walked off with steph and the rest. yea i'll probably still burst out into tears w/out yu so it's better when yu're thr XD. and thanks for making me laugh once agn. maybe i'd have cried all the way from sch till home if yu werent thr. thanks for detouring with me to 7 11 under the hot hot sun and for accompanying me. but im still more used to listening to eh szewan, bu yao sheng qi lah, rather than eh szewan, bu yao shang xin le. sheng qi sounds more shun er XD. thankyou hannah for evrything yu've done.

ppl, if yu evr see a girl who's willing to wait for a friend for hrs jus to go home with her, a girl who doesnt mind listening to her friend scolding her whenevr her friend's in a bad mood, a girl who'd do anything jus to make sure her friend happy, it's hannah

LOOK THE WORLD IN THE EYE (but dont stare, it's rude)

What were you doing 10 years ago?

- uhm le't see, i was only 5 then! probably trying to tell my mum how my cousin always bullies me?

5 Songs which you know all the lyrics off your head right now:

- zui shou xi de mo sheng ren, yi ran shi peng you, ta hai shi bu dong, tonight and the rest of my life and yi shi de mei hao

5 things you would do if you are a millionaire?

- buy a nice cosy hse and live with my family forevr after, buy evry clothe and shoe and bag i like, travel arnd the world, build a nice big pet shop! and buy evry chocolate i see

5 Bad Habits:

- playing with the retainer in my mouth, shaking my leg, showing ppl my blackest face when i have pms, lose my temper easily and uhhhhhh not looking at ppl when i talk to them

5 things you like doing:

- READING!, talking and talking non stop, singing, try to twist and turn my pen during lessons (i hate waiteng and vincent!) and shopping

5 Things you would never wear, buy, or get new again?

- mmmmmm i rly dontknw...

5 favourite toys:

- barbie? well that was wht i played 10 yrs ago.

5 ppl i want to do this lame thing:

- sharon, kaying, wanchin, yolanda and nicole

i screwed ytd's talent time and music CA. gosh i think i might as well bang my head against the wall. okay 1stly i almost died of coldness in music rm. i was shivering like mad while dng the test and i was scared of talent time and i ended up wanting to go to the toilet all the while -.-". and and i totally screwed evrything lah okay? bonus qsn: name any church mode. so mr tan asked us to fill up evrything and guess wht came up onto my mind 1st? lymphatic. HAHAHAHA i dontknw why but that word keeps popping up in my mind and since i had to fill up the blank so i filled. THEN MR TAN LAUGHED AT ME! ... say it's not bio lesson. i wna cry. i dont feel like talking abt talent time, it was plain horrible.

i've finished reading shopaholic ties the knot! omg i love sophie kinsella she's the greatest writer on earth. now i wna read the undomestic goddess. anyone has it, anyone?

okay damn i've got like 2 ulcers side by side on the top right side of my mouth and another one's coming. ALL NEXT TO EACH OTHER like wth. i dont understand why thr mus be such things as ulcers in this world. i hate ulcers. i've got like millions of them evr since i've gotten my braces on and now when i've finally removed them, here they are coming agn cus im too heaty. they'll nvr get out of my life sigh.

anw now im wearing the stupid retainer. cant talk properly or do anything properly. plus, it keeps falling off. and i have to wear it for 9 bloody mths! that's even longer than the time i have to put on my braces. i hate it.


i jus finished my 1st piece of hw, zuo wen and i've got loaaaaaaaaaaaaaads more. thr are tests all ovr next week and tada, i've still not started studying. seriously, i think i need to get counselled. im getting all so stressed up i jus squatted down and cried at some, i-dontknw-whr staircase in the morning. evrytime i think of hw and test and CA and music, i jus feel like staying at home forevr and nvr evr step out of home. well, unless it's to go to some mall or HK XD. plus im having my pms now and it jus worsens evrything so that's why im in such a bad mood. stress+ bad mood+ stupid retainer+ ulcers and i think i'll soon be led to depression.

haiyah, im jus gna go studyyyyyy at 11.48pm -.-"

WAH TODAY DAMN FUN AH! hahahaha i pon-ed guzheng cus i followed the sch to watch i not stupid too. had to sit according to class, but ms dyane rocks was soooo kind to exchange tickets with hannah so i sat next to hannah XD! so we met at grand audi at arnd 2.30 and bus 14 was the last to come can. evryone's happily at suntec shopping and waiting for 3.50 to come but we're still in sch. ended up reaching thr at like 3.30 or even later. but anw, hannah was actually at toys r us playing -.-". kept asking her to go buy popcorn but she say wait for me 1st. then tada, when i reached thr the queue was so friggin' long! so we decided to get sushi from carrefour and uh, we kinda didnt get much sushi but we got a whole tub of ice cream... at 1st we saw the word as banana but when we opened it in the cinema the word turned out to be balance -.-" okay nvrm we're blind. okayokay so we got back up at exactly 4 and i passed hannah's ticket to ms dyane rocks. went into the cinema then blah blah watched the movie, complained abt the icecream, cried, joked, ate sushi, share sweets, complain abt how we cant get out to go to the toilet cus we're all the way in, ayah whtevr yu'll do in a cinema with yur friends lah. and hahahahhaa the funniest thing was, we thot the lady who uses the plate to draw her eyebrows look abit like yol's mum :/ (no offence ahhhhh qinaide XD) so we ended up laughing throughout the whole movie instead of crying when we're supposed to. after the movie finished i made hannah throw the tub of 3/4 finished icecream and she, being the always suay woman, threw a tub of icecream but ended up making a mess becus evrything toppled ovr.

worst thing was, WE WERE IN SCH UNI! feel like crying. we missed so much fun okay! all thanks to our uniform. we cldnt go into the arcade cus we were wearing uni. we wanted to play the "kiap" the softoy up that thing oneeee! smmore got one is my pooh bear that bu dao weng thingy it looked so fun lah! but nvrm we're smart so we said, playing those games are a waste of money since yu cant guarantee yu'll get anything and then off we went to turn the toy thingy. yu knw the one whr yu turn turn then one ball inside got toy one? ah that one. HAHAHAHA hannah went arnd changing for 1 buck lah -.-" so malu. but we had fun, loadsa fun altho it's jus that short period of time. went arnd walking and the banana and lemon kept covering my eyes cus i take evry few steps will see a shop i like and i'll go ovr. they forbade me to shop! anw, i was supposed to have tuition at 7.30 but it was alrdy 7 so they kept rushing me (hahaha thankyou ppl) but i still didnt go for tuition in the end. jus wished we had all the time in the world to play and shop. so, reached home at arnd 8+. urghs now im so tired but thankyou evryone who made my day XD esp banana and lemon!