grade 6 guzheng exam is on monday 4th dec 2006.

like, can smone pls pls save me? I HAVE TOTALLY NO IDEA HOW I'M GNA PASS THIS OKAY?! god bless...

anw, i'll be leaving for hk on 5th dec. that'll be sth i'm looking forward to. so pls, 4th dec, pls kindly come soon and end soon.

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schedule for the rest of the week.

today: guzheng 2.30- 4.30 and phy tuition 7.30- 9
wed: guzheng 3- 4
thurs: piano 11.15- 12.15, guzheng 2.30- 4.30 and a maths tuition 7.30- 9
fri: guzheng 5.45- ???

okay so i've got such a boring life. evryday's guzheng and guzheng and guzheng. and for last week, we had guzheng on tues, thurs, fri, sat. i cant wait to go back to hk so i can finally relax and get away from all those piano lessons and guzheng lessons and tuitions. it's not that i dont like them, i jus feel so packed with all these stuff gng on evry single day. it's the holidays! i mean, how can anyone actually spend their holidays like that. i havent even found time to start on my hw. alright hk, here i comeeeeeee. i cant wait to reach thr, seriously. and haha i love my clothes thr. okay whtever. the main point is, i need a break.

alright, i'll post up the pictures of cchmsgz's outings uhm, i dontknw, later or sth. and i really hope the jan 6 performance will come reaaal soon so we'll get another chance to bond while practicing for the performance. woooooots-, i cant wait to see the costume.

had a whole day of fun ytd. so, i woke up at 10.30 and met charmaine at 11. then we left for east coast to meet lena and winnie. HAHA they walk so slow luh. anw, we went to rent a bike and wanted to ride till changi BUT, winnie, the wei xian ren wu (she rides fast but she very dangerous cus she rides almost evrywhr and threatens to bang evryone HAHA), ended up knocking into lena and the poor girl fell. we spent quite a lot of time helping lena with the wound. then we rode back to the shop and returned our bikes since lena cldnt ride anymore. and they went to the arcade -.-". nth much nice thr so we went back down to the bowling alley, sat thr and because we were so so bored we ended up playing some concentration game while we waited for my mum to come.

my mum dropped us off at winnie's hse. her mum helped lena to clean the wound properly while me and winnie boiled chicken soup, LOL. then later, we all ended up watching wan quan yu le and laughed our ass off. they finally decided that it was time to go to the bbq pit and so we went to each other's hse to get the food and all. but damn it, we waited till 6.20 for the guy to open the pit. as usual, we started the fire, cooked, blahblah. then we took out the whipped cream. at 1st it was to smash it onto alvin, our bday boy's, face but then lala they ran into some trouble so we played with it ourselves in the end.

then the rain came ARGH. but nvrm, we hid under the shelter and waited for it to stop but ms shasha, stayed outside and evryone thought it'd be fun to play in the rain. i brought glitter up 1st cus she'd be afraid of the rain. when i came down they were trying to use the basketball to get the volleyball down the tree. and after many different methods of getting the ball back, only winnie managed to shoot the basketball up till it hit the volleyball, macho woman lah that one. so we continued playing all sorts of dumb games with the ball but in the end we all went to the basketball court to play basketball. blahblahblah, played till arnd 10.30 then some of them had to leave alrdy. so me, shasha, alvin and sanchun stayed to pack up. came home and i showered and straight away i plopped dead on the bed.

oh shit oh shit im supposed to go down at 11 and it's 10.56 now and i still havent change. okay tata

okay so i woke up from my beauty nap. and supposingly, i shld have calmed down alrdy. but unfortunately, i still feel steam coming out from my head. haha okay whtever.

i hate it when ppl do/ say/ talk abt things behind my back. and hello, they didnt even bother to hide the fact that i was the subject.

seriously, i'vr nvr evr been so angry in my life. it jus feels like suddenly evrything small little bad things these ppl had done or said that i nvr complained abt befor suddenly comes crashing back and making me even angrier.

i walked all the way back to class to pass them a packet of tissue and nobody mentioned any form of gratitude. and instead of thanking me, they thought i was jus plain stupid to be walking back thr out of kindness because they didnt ask me to. so from now onwards, i shall only do what they tell me to. otherwise i'll be doing sth extra.

i dislike hate his attitude.

i dislike hate all of those "you think i care?"s, "your business ah?", "jealous is it?" and all. anyone that uses these can forget abt talking to me. i've jus been superly pissed off by such phrases.

yea if you didnt care then you wldnt even be using them to talk to me. right, like i care. fuck off.

anw, today in sch, i learnt that girls shld nvr share anything with guys. because nvr in their life will the guys treat the girls the same way. so we need not tell them anything secretive because we'll nvr recieve the same kind of treatment. they wont bother abt letting us knw more. our lives are pathetic.

so, apparently, i've jus been treated like some sort of busybody who shldnt have poked her nose into their business since, well, im a girl. because of that, nobody was willling to tell me what's happening jus because they think that im not worth wasting time on. they didnt want to waste time on explaining shit to me. they presumed a girl shldnt be caring abt guy's business and only guys and help guys. hao xin mei hao bao. and when they need our help they always come to us, asking for opinions and advice and all.

alright forget it. i dont make sense at all. im too pissed off and angry to knw what im writing

okay befor i slp, jus a short post.

i dropped a roll of toilet paper into the toilet bowl this evening jus after i woke up from my nap. but you cant blame me, i wasnt in a fully conscious state. then i went down for tuition and was late (as usual) and i actually wanted to burst into class and yell at mrchia, HI MR CHIA LONG TIME NO SEE, only to find that we changed a phy teacher. i miss you mrchia :(

camp was disastrous and thank god im home. only gd things was davin's mattress and that midnight talk with stead on that HAHA very-comfortable-as-compared-to-wht-others-are-slping-on mattress.

i feel so disappointed, and well, disgusted with myself. that scene kept playing over and over in my mind and it jus doesnt seem to go away. for once, i wished my memories will be washed off and then i'll forget evrything i ever did in the past few days. i hate myself and i feel so cheap

then after the talk with stead last night, i tossed and turned on the "bed" for an hr and yea, thought abt a lot of things. im sorry stead if im gna disappoint you but no, i dont plan to do anything. im seriously not in the mood for anything right now and i jus wished i'd disappear. i knw you might think im stupid or crazy or dumb but i really really think i shld lock myself up and stay away from the world. or maybe i shld go be a nun and reflect on what a total bitch i've been.

and even as im typing now im still thinking of how disgusted i feel abt myself. i seriously feel like throwing out all those details like how i throw up my food. i feel like, fuck, i dontknw.

but whatever it is, thankyou stead for being thr and coming to my hse today to uhm, slp with me, LOL and watch huan zhu ge ge. i hope mr-nice-guy will haha, stop being so nice in future

alright, i shall go and forget abt that fucking scene that makes me so disgusted with myself. wish me luckkkkkk otherwise i might go arnd killing ppl since i dont wna consider committing suicide